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So much of wedding preparation focuses on details surrounding the reception, causing the most important part— the marriage ceremony, to take a back seat. Most ceremonies that take place in a religious dwelling like a church or a temple, are performed by their resident presiders. With a growing number of ceremonies taking place outdoors or at a reception site, couples are faced with the decision of choosing the perfect person to officially join them in matrimony.

While there are many talented and experienced marriage officiants to choose from, more brides and grooms are choosing an alternate and less expensive option— asking a friend or family to perform their ceremony. In addition to saving money, this is a great way to make this part of your wedding truly personal. Here are some tips on how to make it happen:

Be choosy

When you are picking the person who will performing your ceremony, take the time to make the best selection. Consider that this friend or family member needs to be reliable and dedicated to being present at the rehearsal, ceremony and marriage license signing. Choosing somebody who speaks clearly and doesn’t suffer from “stage fright” is also important. It’s a good idea to have a couple of people in mind to choose from, in case your first choice declines.

Make it official

Whether your friend or family member chooses to become ordained online or in person, make sure that the organization is credible. There are many scams on the internet that claim to ordain ministers for free and within a manner of minutes. Decide whether you would like them to be ordained by a religious or interfaith denomination and then ensure that the organization is legitimate, by checking with your Secretary of State. The fees will vary depending on the organization, but should be a nominal cost (under $25.00).

Work together

Just as you would with a religious official, you should be prepared to meet with your selected presider to plan the content and order of the ceremony. The Declaration of Intent (vows) are mandatory in order for the marriage to be legal. Other sections of the ceremony typically include a welcome, readings, a ring exchange, pronouncement. Take the opportunity to make your wedding truly personable, by sharing stories or anecdotes about your relationship with your officiant so that they can share with your guests during the ceremony. Above all, remember that the ceremony IS the most important part of your wedding, so make the time to ensure it’s special!

Don’t forget to check back for more tips in our money saving series!